[It takes nothing but time for him to be drained of his shyness. The more they kiss, the bolder he becomes. Before long he even has a hand cupping Jakurai's face to keep him tilted towards him and in the place and angle that feels right for him.
When finally, Doppo has to part for air. Resting his forehead on Jakurai's. He doesn't want to be apart for long nor does he really want to part at all. But... here they are. Gazing into one another's eyes.]
[his face is flushed, his lips still close to Doppo's. his eyes don't leave him - if Jakurai's expression says anything, it's that he's into this. perhaps a little needy.]
Is it...maybe, that sometimes Jakurai is a little needy too?
[Because Jakurai deprives himself. Because Jakurai is a man who gives others his entire being in service and care. He rests his forehead against Jakurai's. He knows for a fact that he could love this man.
[so close, hearing Doppo speak his name, there is no defense. there is no alternative but the direct truth. he's cracked himself open some, to let Doppo see - he trusts him dearly, with his life, with his being like this.
he'd nod if not for the worry that he'd knock his head into Doppo's. so instead, he summons up his courage to say a word that shouldn't be this hard.]
Yes.
[yes, sometimes he doesn't want to be deprived. doesn't want to give his entire self away. he wants to want, and not feel guilty over it.]
You can want things too, Jakurai. It's kind of hard to say that when you work in a setting where you are always at someone else's beck and call. Where you always have to tend to someone else.
But let me... tend to you for once. Don't worry about anything else tonight but me, okay?
[he knows Doppo's speaking the truth, that he's saying words that Jakurai would say to someone that's not him, someone who needed to hear it. and yet he wants to say that it's silly, that Doppo needs his care, so reflexive to say that sort of thing. by his nature, he wants to take care of someone else. it's foreign to be the recipient, to be cared for.
except then Doppo's teeth are on his neck, and he can't protest, when a wordless sound escapes his throat - his neck is sensitive, he's never forgotten - and maybe this wasn't such a farfetched idea at all.]
no subject
Date: 2019-01-05 06:11 pm (UTC)When finally, Doppo has to part for air. Resting his forehead on Jakurai's. He doesn't want to be apart for long nor does he really want to part at all. But... here they are. Gazing into one another's eyes.]
no subject
Date: 2019-01-06 02:08 am (UTC)[his face is flushed, his lips still close to Doppo's. his eyes don't leave him - if Jakurai's expression says anything, it's that he's into this. perhaps a little needy.]
no subject
Date: 2019-01-12 06:38 pm (UTC)[Because Jakurai deprives himself. Because Jakurai is a man who gives others his entire being in service and care. He rests his forehead against Jakurai's. He knows for a fact that he could love this man.
Maybe he already does.]
no subject
Date: 2019-01-13 08:43 am (UTC)he'd nod if not for the worry that he'd knock his head into Doppo's. so instead, he summons up his courage to say a word that shouldn't be this hard.]
Yes.
[yes, sometimes he doesn't want to be deprived. doesn't want to give his entire self away. he wants to want, and not feel guilty over it.]
no subject
Date: 2019-01-22 06:01 am (UTC)But let me... tend to you for once. Don't worry about anything else tonight but me, okay?
[He pecks him again, and then nips his neck.]
no subject
Date: 2019-01-22 06:44 am (UTC)except then Doppo's teeth are on his neck, and he can't protest, when a wordless sound escapes his throat - his neck is sensitive, he's never forgotten - and maybe this wasn't such a farfetched idea at all.]
Okay. I'll try, Doppo.
[he can't promise more than that.]